My Little Marilyn Manson

15 04 2010

Big G has a cousin who’s 3 years older than him, so we get a good amount of hand-me-downs. This works out nicely since we’re poor. The only drawback to this plan? My nephew, Gigantor, the 6-year-old boy who is almost as tall as his mother. Admittedly, I have been known to call my sister-in-law “Shrimpy McShrimp,” but still.

When I pulled out the summer clothes this week, I discovered a total of two short-sleeved shirts. I was terribly confused until a phone call to my brother clarified the situation–Gigantor grew so quickly that he completely skipped 4T summer clothes. Which means–yay! I get to buy clothes for my son! Also, boo! I have to buy clothes for my son! I dislike this situation, because it confuses my priorities. I need to shop! I need to save money! But my son needs clothes! But I’m so poor! I don’t need this stress.

Since temperatures are in the 70s now, I decided Big G probably needs a few t-shirts, like, yesterday, so I set off to Shopko. It’s much closer to my house than Wal-Mart, but not at all less frightening.

Big G is now of an age where I can start poking around the boys’ clothing rather than the toddler sizes. Fun, right? Yeah, not so much. I am, quite frankly, horrified by the options available to my 4-year-old. First up, we have the “Peter Steele died so I won’t be leaving my room for the next week” look:

Would I have to dye his hair black, too?

Next up, we have the “I’m a damn hippie” look:

At least I wouldn't have to cut his hair!

I’ve always been a fan of the “It’s never too early to contemplate death” look:

And last, but certainly not least, the “Train a child up” look:

Did I happen to mention that my son is FOUR? I realize I’m probably reading too much into all of this, and I need to loosen up, but really?

I do continue to be grateful for my boys. I’d much rather contend with this:

Available in sizes 6 months to 5T!

Than this:

Available in sizes 7 to 16!




9 responses

16 04 2010

Yeah the last one you don’t want to contend with….. Try having a pudgy, but beautiful nonetheless daughter that is 5 and find her a swimsuit that don’t look like said one above! (Did I mention she needs at least a 12 or 14 to fit her right)

16 04 2010
Kristina P.

I am definitely a fan of the skulls.

16 04 2010

Jenn, I know I’m old now. I just don’t remember having such a cool selection of clothes when I was Big G’s age…

16 04 2010

Oi. Yeah. Did you see the article about the padded bikini tops that were being marketed to girls? As in, 7-years-old and up? And I won’t bore you with stories of my green-mohawked, ear-pierced kindergartner. Suffice it to say, he has an attitude to match (at five-freaking-years-old!).

In related news, go to and check out the overstocks. Sometimes the pickings are a little slim, but I’ve had really good luck outfitting Elizabeth there, at prices that are comparable to Walmart, and with quality that is considerately better.

16 04 2010

Oh my heck!! I am dying. My eldest is in a similar situation, since she is so tall, she has been out of the toddler sizes for a while…and trying to fins clother that don’t make her look like a very cheap streetwalker is SOO frustrating. and don’t even get me started on swimsuits!! Yeah, I was at ShopKo the other day, and I was thinking the same thing about the boys clothing…you could always try the whole Plain T-shirt look….not super exciting, but at least he isn’t a walking billboard for the devil…(ha ha)

16 04 2010

My house Sunday. There will be six suitable tops with short sleeves. Shorts are optional.

17 04 2010

Pants are always optional at our house.

17 04 2010

Mom’s rock! (but not in a ‘way of life’ sort of way).

I’ve got four girls. Feel my pain.

17 04 2010

i totally knew what your follow-up comment to your mom’s would be, before i even scrolled down.

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